Thursday, April 07, 2005

smells like teen rectum

*waits for some privacy so i can post*

so yesterday, i took my mom for a walk to check out the flood damage around here. it kinda sucks, because my street is like caving in on the one side the pavement and half the lawn just floated on down the river. and the street my dad's old house is on is on this steep incline. and half the street and the guard rails completely collapsed. or mudslided. whatever. i wanted to take pics but the penndot guys wouldn't let me get out of the car. "turn around." lick my dead dog's scrotum, asshole.

the fun part was dragging my mom along with me into the old power plant's fenced-in field. it's open to the public, but they have guard rails set up so people don't get the idea to go joyriding, 'cause somebody did that like 5 years ago and fell in the river (car and all) and died. and so you have to climb over the guard rails to get in there. me, all i gotta do is step up on them and jump over them. my mom had to take forever to do it. and she tells me to lose weight. i think if i lose anymore, i might die.

and so i went exploring that area for a while. and it's pretty bad from the flood. all the mud and shit buried the train tracks. and there's trees fallen all over. and i got spurs, or burs, or whatever the fuck they're called stuck to my shirt. thank god for long nails. and i got attacked by those stupid weeds or plants or whatever that have thorns like roses. so my legs are all cut up. but it was nice to get out, i guess.

and i also realized how white my skin is when i went out in the sun yesterday. it kinda looks like erin's. i need to lay out in the sun and burn for a few hours.

and this really isn't worth mentioning but i just made a yummy burger.

dead animals on plates. <3

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

and people say i'm weird

someone found this blog by googling "weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." have i ever written "weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee?" what the fuck kind of retard googles "weeeeeeeeeeee" just for the hell of it? are you trippin' on acid or some shit?

...die.

i used to be a fat bitch

now i'm just a skinny, geeky bitch. yeah, muthafucka.

anyway.

check out these blogs. or i vill keel yew.

-
erin's like a genius, so you should check out her blog and stalk her like i do.
- and check out
raymi's blog, because she makes me spit my drink all over my purdy little laptop, just like erin does. oh, and i found her via erin.
- did you know
erin posted a picture of her tits for 16 minutes on sunday? if i were into chicks, i'd be all over that like a fat kid on cake. even though she put the wrong link for my blog on hers. hehe.
- and
triman draws super wicked shit in ms paint and you should check out his blog cuz i said so, just don't tell him i drew a better picture of garfield.
- and
jason like never posts and he's strange in a good sort of way (i think) and just wait, i'll think of more excuses to make you like him.
-
saher's da bomb and i stalk her, too. maybe a little more than i do erin. gee, this is just turning into a big creepy post now.
- and check out
this dude.
- and this
pissed off lady who thinks she's a cat.
- and this
cynical australian chick who's obsessed with a media icon, but that's okay.
-
hunter's cynical and weird sometimes, too. but he never posts anymore. so kick his ass so i don't have to when i get to nashville.

in other news, i got my first photo published. kudos to me on my way to being miss supercool freelance photographer. really. just not the supercool part.


and kudos to the electricity company for turning the power back on after it being off for eleven and half hours. i've never had my nipples hard for eleven and half hours before. but the cold is amazing in what it can do. hehe, and the river is flowing over the banks. i'm gonna get evacuated. wee, fun.

Monday, April 04, 2005

bras are sadistic

i hate my bra(s). they always make my boobs look bigger than what i really got. i feel sorry for the next dude to convince me to take off that contraption to see what's underneath.

"...that's it?"

shoulda warned ya, buddy. you were hoping for pam anderson's boobs and you got milla jovovich's. sucks to be you. and me.

leave me and my tiny ta-ta's be.

Sunday, April 03, 2005

Cue The Jeopardy Music...

"No, Mommy, don't do it again,
Don't do it again, I'll be a good boy,
I'll be a good boy, I promise.
No, Mommy don't hit me,
OW!
Why did you have to hit me like that, Mommy?
Don't do it, you're hurting me, OW!
Why do you have to be such a bitch?
Why don't you, why don't you fuck off and die!
Why can't you just fuck off and die!
Why can't you just leave here and die!
Never stick your hand in my face again, bitch.
FUCK YOU!
I don't need this shit!
You stupid, sadistic, abusive, fucking whore.
Would you like to see how it feels, Mommy?
Here it comes, get ready to DIE!"

Ten points to the first person who can identify the song I'm listening to. Hint: OH WA AH AH AH!

Friday, April 01, 2005

Hmm...

I was thinking of telling my mom and/or Ricc that I've become a lesbian, as an April Fools Day joke, but I'm thinking that I don't want to give them a heart attack. Sorry, H, we'll have to come out of the closet another day. Sigh...

Thursday, March 31, 2005

SUGAR!!!

Muhahahaha. I'm so on a fucking sugar rush right now. Mmm, chocolate milk. Who cares if it goes directly to my hips? So do guys, what's the point? Heehee.

And, um... yeah... that's about it. ^_^

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

a day in the life of a loser

nothing good to update on.
sorry to disappoint you.
i know you all care about my well-being (*cough, choke, die*).
only thing good happening is its getting warm.
ten points to mother nature on that one.
i have a cut on the back of my neck.
no, i didnt get kinky with someone.
a king size box spring came barrelling down the steps at me.
my head was caught between the door frame and the box spring.
fun fun.
not impressed yet?
me either.
i have a secret.
for your ears and not your eyes.
the moment you are born.
you begin to diiiiiiiiiiiiie.